March 2017
The Herb Farm

You Call That Religion?

 

Cameo basil is a low-growing, container variety.

Ever since I can remember, there was something about March that signaled the endorphins in our brains to start our bodies digging in the dirt, preparing planting beds, sowing seeds and the like. Maybe it is just the sunlight in the sky getting longer through the day or the scent of freshly crushed green plants beneath our feet – like a wino craves a drink after getting a whiff of isopropyl alcohol.

Maybe the reason we start to think about this ritual is simply because we have been taught over the years that it is the right thing to do. Brainwashed, we are. It has become a religion; a cult, if you will, pulling us to the light and compelling us to disrupt what Mother Nature has so meticulously left her mark on. With blistering and callused hands, we don boots and gloves to serve the needs of our souls.

How many of you are ready? How many of you are ready to admit your sins of visual, selfish pleasures? How many of you are ready to realize you have been the victim of evil; the torturer under the influence of the cult of soil poisoning, water-wasting turfgrass farmers?

Let me tell you folks, it’s time for you to WAKE UP! I believe you are ready. I believe you are ready to make a difference. I believe you are ready to show the rest of the world how we should all live our lives in harmony with nature. Yes, my friends, I do believe you are ready.

I believe you are ready to STOP pouring your money down the drain. I believe you are ready to take yourselves and your yards to the Promised Land. The land where all of your efforts to grow plants in order to have a showplace lawn will not be in vain; the land where you are not growing pretentious green turf to tease the world, only to block anyone from treading your lushness, the land where you will truly reap benefits from what you sow – that is the goal, my friends. The golden goal is to be free and plant the plants that feed us. Plant the plants that nurture us. Plant the plants that nurture our mother, Mother Earth, for the Promised Land is truly in your own yard.

Hear my words, my friends. Feel the movement. I implore you to let me proselytize you. I am not the only evangelist out here. I know there are many of you. You are just waiting …waiting on someone to speak up! Let us all work together. We can accomplish so much good in this world. Together, we can fight evil and show the world we know the great plan. We are ready.

Use your favorite pancake mix. Use buttermilk and a little sour cream for extra flaky cakes. Use a teaspoon of vanilla extract for a flavor boost. Drop pecan halves into your cakes before you turn them. Serve with berries, butter and local honey or syrup.

 

You know, I told you a story a few years ago about walking down the sidewalks of a gated community and I noticed hundreds of earthworms that had crawled from their home soil to the sidewalks to die. They had done this because the contracted lawn service companies had sprayed the grasses and shrubbery with poisons. That really gets me going when I think about how wasteful and mindless it is to just to have a patch of useless green over their dirt when they could grow food that is much less expense to maintain. Are those types of people stupid or lazy? Maybe we should show them a better way through door-to-door education. I’m ready and willing to do it. Are you ready? I believe you are.

 

Let’s live by example. It is not going to be easy. We have to change our rituals so they become habits. We must interplant edibles among our ornamentals. We must keep our properties clean and neat. We must keep the curb appeal so others won’t turn up their noses at what we preach. We should share our bounty with our neighbors.

It is important to plant at least one thing in your yard that is edible. If you have a small lot, then plant a tomato or pepper plant in a pot. You can plant some basil or chives to use in your kitchen. Use thyme or marjoram as border plants along sidewalks or driveways. Plant flowers to share, too. Zinnias make great cut flowers and birds, bees and butterflies love them as well. Besides, fresh flowers on the table make for a great setting for a meal. That’s one of my simple pleasures in life.

 

Hotcakes on the griddle, to be served  with homegrown tomatoes. Mm-mm!

   

Starting right now, please help me show the rest of the world that we can all live a better life if we simply start growing plants that feed us. Thank you all for your support in this important effort. If you want to find out more about how you can eat your yard, please email me. I will be happy to help.

My name is Herb Farmer and I Eat My Yard (ieatmyyard.com)!

Until next time, remember to watch your salt and sugar, drink plenty of pure water, and breathe in and out!

Thanks for reading!

For more information, email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. I’ll answer your questions and I enjoy the emails!

Be sure to find me on Facebook at Herb Farmer-The Herb Farm.

 

As always, check with an expert, like your doctor, before using any herbal remedy.